Why Terry Should Listen To Katherine
This all actually happened, earlier tonight, as I wandered in and out of the room when my roommates were watching the Sox/Cleveland game:
[It's the 7th inning; Sox up by 1]
Announcers: And this will be Schilling's 117th pitch of the night...
Me: TAKE HIM OUT, TERRY! Oh my God, take him out! Do you not remember what happens when we leave pitchers in too long? What happens to Pedro, with the melting down? What happened to Schilling? And what happened to Schilling those other times?
[Indians batter: RBI!]
Me: Did I not? What did I just say? What did I JUST say?
---
[Now it's the 8th inning; game is still tied, Sox have Youkilis on 2nd after a stolen base. There are 1 or 2 outs.]
Me: What? The Indians are walking Ortiz? Are they retarded?
Announcers: Well, it looks like an intentional walk to David Ortiz...
Me: They're walking Ortiz to get to Manny. Ortiz sucks in clutch situations! That's the worst idea ever.
[Ortiz walks, Manny connects on the first pitch]
Announcers: It's back, waaay back.... It's gone!
Me: Why won't these managers LISTEN to me? I'm 2 for 2!
Now the score is 8-5, Sox, and I can only imagine Terry is going to put in Timlin, who will then proceed to give up three runs, thus tying it and sending it to extra innings, like, you don't get paid per inning, Red Sox. Try to win or lose games within the alloted 9, please?
Although, having grown up going to Angels games, I became accustomed to a squintey-eyed fellow named Troy Percival, who would give up nearly or all of the number of runs his team was up by, thus creating "drama" and "suspense" for the fans. Really, we were just pretty sure he couldn't actually see the strike zone from 61 feet away, and would use the home runs scored off of him as a sort of trial and error practice session, because eventually he would start shutting batters down in three pitches. But Timlin doesn't have the excuse of poor vision; he just seems to hate it when the Red Sox don't lose dramatically. Evidence for this? He has given up another run in the time it took to type this. Thanks, Mike. Thanks for reminding me of my youth.
[It's the 7th inning; Sox up by 1]
Announcers: And this will be Schilling's 117th pitch of the night...
Me: TAKE HIM OUT, TERRY! Oh my God, take him out! Do you not remember what happens when we leave pitchers in too long? What happens to Pedro, with the melting down? What happened to Schilling? And what happened to Schilling those other times?
[Indians batter: RBI!]
Me: Did I not? What did I just say? What did I JUST say?
---
[Now it's the 8th inning; game is still tied, Sox have Youkilis on 2nd after a stolen base. There are 1 or 2 outs.]
Me: What? The Indians are walking Ortiz? Are they retarded?
Announcers: Well, it looks like an intentional walk to David Ortiz...
Me: They're walking Ortiz to get to Manny. Ortiz sucks in clutch situations! That's the worst idea ever.
[Ortiz walks, Manny connects on the first pitch]
Announcers: It's back, waaay back.... It's gone!
Me: Why won't these managers LISTEN to me? I'm 2 for 2!
Now the score is 8-5, Sox, and I can only imagine Terry is going to put in Timlin, who will then proceed to give up three runs, thus tying it and sending it to extra innings, like, you don't get paid per inning, Red Sox. Try to win or lose games within the alloted 9, please?
Although, having grown up going to Angels games, I became accustomed to a squintey-eyed fellow named Troy Percival, who would give up nearly or all of the number of runs his team was up by, thus creating "drama" and "suspense" for the fans. Really, we were just pretty sure he couldn't actually see the strike zone from 61 feet away, and would use the home runs scored off of him as a sort of trial and error practice session, because eventually he would start shutting batters down in three pitches. But Timlin doesn't have the excuse of poor vision; he just seems to hate it when the Red Sox don't lose dramatically. Evidence for this? He has given up another run in the time it took to type this. Thanks, Mike. Thanks for reminding me of my youth.
posted by Katherine at 10:05 PM
1 Comments:
Soscia could use your help these days as well. The only thing that hasn't gone wrong for the Angels is for someone to fall through Salmon's trap door out in right. :)
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